Who Are We? Where Are We Going? And Is It All Worth It?
These are the questions that we soon come to realize will never cease to be asked, but have become exquisitely prevalent in our current situations...whatever and wherever they might be.
Have you ever felt this feeling of total hopelessness and confusion? Almost like you're out of sync with yourself and everyone else, but yet you don't know how to get back to the seemingly normal-ness you once knew?
This my friends, is the feeling, and soon realization, that you're growing up!
The worst part about it all is that you feel like you're the only one going through it, because no one ever seems to want to admit they don't have it all together, and they don't know what the fuck they're doing.
In life, we have certain pathways, though we can choose whether or not to take them, that are provided to us with the untrustworthy guarantee of success. It's almost like we know we're buying into a gimmick yet we choose to keep smiling and waving because we're just too afraid of what might be behind door number two.
However if we're even the slightest bit curious of what's behind door number two--if and when we choose to make our own decisions earlier on in life that go against the river everyone seems to be coasting along on, we must face something extremely scary: The Metaphorical Cliff.
I like to view the metaphorical cliff as something we've all come across in life, and will continue to come across based on our willingness. The metaphorical cliff is kind of like this really big thing you have to do in order to *hopefully* get to a place you want to be at. I call this the metaphorical cliff because it's fucking scary but what waits for you at the bottom could quite easily makeup for the free fall.
Choosing to dive off the metaphorical cliff is always way harder and scarier than we originally realize, because the free fall is one that can last as quickly as 30 seconds, to as long as a year. (And maybe the part that's even scarier than that is being so indecisive with what you want to do that you're halfway off the cliff, but clinging onto anything you can see that might pull you back onto solid ground.)
As I'm currently in my own metaphorical free fall, what I've come to realize is that I'm completely and utterly lost, and having a great-horrible-hilarious-confusing-okay time trying to figure it all out.
Life is one big mush of confusion, tears, laughter, love, relationships, jumping up and down, pissing your pants, banging your head against the wall, all to fall asleep, wake up, and do it again. If you're not doing something you love-If you're not happy, ask yourself why not, and what can I do to change my situation? Anything can be figured out, and nothing is permanent. Of course some circumstances are more confusing than others to propose this question to, but I try to subscribe to this method whenever I can because the only one who can change your life is YOU.
What are we doing right now to get us to where we want to be? What are our dreams? Are we in love or out of it? Do we want to wear glitter for the rest of our lives or suits and sit at a cubicle? Do we want to live or just survive?
Life is all about questions that require answers even if the answer is I DON'T KNOW! The quicker we learn to have faith that everything will always figure itself out, the quicker we become comfortable with the idea that it's okay to not know, and that in fact, we'll never really know: what we're doing, what's going on, and who we are, the easier it becomes to realize we might not always know who we are, where we're going, and if it's even worth it, but that's okay.